Golfer

A golfer is in a competitive match with a fierce rival, who is ahead by several strokes. The golfer mutters to himself, "I'd give anything to sink this next putt."

A stranger walks up to him and whispers, "Would you give up a quarter of your sex life?" The golfer thinks the man is crazy and that his answer will be meaningless, but also that perhaps this is a good omen, so he says, "Okay, that I will" and sinks the putt.

Two holes later he mumbles to himself, "Oh misery! If I could only get an eagle on this hole." The same stranger moves to his side and says, "Would it be worth another quarter of your sex life?" The golfer shrugs and says, "Sure and I will." He makes an eagle.

On the final hole, the golfer needs yet another eagle to win. Though he says nothing, the stranger moves to his side and says, "Would you be willing to give up the rest of your sex life to win this match?" Without hesitation the golfer says, "Certainly!" He makes the eagle.

As the golfer walks to the club house, the stranger walks alongside and says, "You know, I've really had you at a disadvantage because you don't know who I am. I am Lucifer, Dark Lord of the Netherworld, and because of
your pact with me, from now on you will have no sex life."

The golfer breaks into a beaming smile and turns to the Devil and says, "Father Bernard O'Malley at your service!"