The Sea

A number of primary schools were doing a project on "The Sea". Kids were asked to draw pictures or write about their experiences. Teachers then got together to compare the results and put together some of the 'better' ones.

1. This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6)

2. Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves to chargers. (Christopher, age 7)

3. Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James, age 6)

4. If you are surrounded by a sea you are an island. If you don't have a sea all around you, you are incontinent. (Wayne, age 7)

5. I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kyle, age 6)

6. A dolphin breathes through an asshole on top of its head. (Billy, age 8)

7. When ships had sails, they used the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind wouldn't blow the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans. (William, age 7)

8. I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen, age 6)

9. When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold and it makes my willy shrink. (Kevin, age 6)